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Welcome to Babies Remembered and Wintergreen Press
The Web Site of Sherokee Ilse
Bereaved Parent, International Speaker and Author of
Empty Arms:Coping with Miscarriage,Stillbirth, and Infant Death

and many other books, including Miscarriage: A Shattered Dream


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LINKS
  • Alliance of Grandparents, A Support in Tragedy (AGAST) International; P. O. Box 271386; Salt Lake City, UT 84127-1386; 888-774-7437 or 800-793-7437; http://www.agast.org; execdir@agast.org. A non-profit organization offering bereavement support for grieving grandparents through Information packets, peer contacts, quarterly newsletter, and remembrance cards.
  • Angel Babies Forever Loved, Inc. http://www.angels4ever.com - Shares grief Information, Daddy's Corner, Multiples Angels Network For Loss in a Multiples Birth, Grandparent's Page, a Need to Talk? area, Message Board, Keepsake Ideas, Memorial Pages, Poetry Page, Meet our Mommies, Subsequent Pregnancy, Friends/Family Page, Meet Our Volunteers, Angel Store & Donations Page
  • Baby Loss - http://www.babyloss.com - An online community offering information and support for bereaved parents who have suffered the death of a baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, intra-uterine death, stillbirth or other types of pregnancy loss.
  • Climb Support - www.climb-support.org - By and for parents throughout the United States, Canada and beyond who have experienced the death of one or more, both or all their children during a twin, triplet or higher multiple pregnancy, at birth, or in infancy or childhood...and caring others
  • Cradle of Wings: A Song for Infant, Child or Pregnancy Loss - This is a beautiful card and song on CD that can be given as a gift to a newly bereaved family by care providers or relatives and friends.  A beautiful piece for a funeral or memorial service.  The artist Pam Armstrong writes, "This song has been used in various settings to express the love we will always have for the little ones who left our arms too soon. It is a song of comfort. It is a tender goodbye." "Cradle of Wings" is available in three forms: a download, a sympathy card with a CD enclosed and a matted art print at Northwestern Bookstores throughout the Mpls/St. Paul area or online at www.cradleofwings.com.
  • Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope is a national 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization that seeks to "put a face" on miscarriage, stillbirth, and infant loss. Our online support community (www.facesofloss.com) features hundreds of real stories of pregnancy/infant loss, categorized and searchable by type of loss, stage of loss, date of loss, location, and keywords, a blog directory, an extensive resource guide, community activities like virtual book clubs and gift exchanges, and more. We also offer in-person support through our Face2Face Friendship Groups program, where we currently have over 125 social support groups up and running in cities across the country. Join us, connect with other women who "get it," and know you're not alone.
  • First Candle/SIDS Alliance - www.firstcandle.org - 1314 Bedford Ave. Suite 210, Baltimore, MD 21208 (800) 221-7437. Responds to parents, families, professionals, and the general public seeking information and support on stillbirth and SIDS. Publications and newsletter.
  • The Forever Bracelet - http://www.elysianjewels.com - The Forever Bracelet in memory of those we have loved and lost. This beautiful site offers to create a personalize bracelet in memory of your loved one. The site's creator donates a portion of the proceeds to charities that help with loss, grief, and hospice care in memory of Terrance Ridgely (1957-2006)
  • Forever Our Angels - http://foreverourangels.tripod.com - No one knows the devastation and heartache of losing a baby more than a father or mother but rarely is it discussed. "Forever Our Angels" is a collection of personal stories told by the men and women who were dealt the blow of miscarriage. - Hannah Stone
  • GriefNet - http://griefnet.org - an Internet community of persons dealing with grief, death, and major loss. We have 37 email support groups and two web sites. Our integrated approach to on line grief support provides help to people working through loss and grief issues of all kinds. Our companion site, KIDSAID, http://kidsaid.com provides a safe environment for kids and their parents to find information and ask questions
  • Hannah.org - www.hannah.org - HP is a Christian-based international network for families dealing with the pain of "fertility challenges" including infertility, pregnancy loss and early infant death
  • Holding On To Faith - www.holdingontofaith.com - This is a story of the personal journey my husband and I encountered while trying to conceive. It is the emotional story of recurring loss and a faith filled story of bringing hope for a future conception. - Audrey Carney
  • The International Society for the Study and Prevention of Perinatal and Infant Death (ISPID) www.ispid.org - is a not-for-profit organization that is leading the world in discovering evidence-based preventive measures for stillbirth and infant death. ISPID is also working to promote improved quality and standardization of care for affected parents.
  • International Stillbirth Alliance (ISA) - www.stillbirthalliance.org - a non-profit coalition of organizations founded by stillbirth parents, is dedicated to understanding the causes and prevention of stillbirth. Raises awareness, educates on recommended precautionary practices and facilitate research on the prevention of stillbirth and serves as a centralized resource for sharing information and connecting organizations and individuals. ISA philosophy's is to unite groups around these issues and use our strengths as a whole to make a difference. We believe that having a centralized place for stillbirth issues and sharing information will accelerate progress. Together groups can provide the public with accurate and validated information about stillbirth.
  • www.last-memories.com is the only one in the world to offer more than 30 unique services that will allow you to keep beautiful memories of your loved ones after many years. Modify the websites with your own graphics, music, pictures, and videos.
  • Life Recorded - http://www.liferecorded.com/- Online Memorial Store - Life Recorded is an online memorial store and bereavement community where members can create and customize memorial plots to store pictures, media and text in memory of deceased loved ones. Plots can be accessed on the internet by friends and family around the world; visitors can add tributes and messages of condolence, or send complimentary sympathy e-cards.
  • MISS Foundation - http://www.misschildren.org - Offers a legislative action opportunity that seeks to have every state offer a BIRTH and death certificate for babies born still (rather than only a fetal demise or death certificate alone). It also offers memorial options for families, an email "pal" to link with others, links for professionals and many resources for both families and professionals.
  • Missing GRACE - www.missingGRACE.org - The Missing GRACE Organization serves to help families on their journey through pregnancy and infant loss, infertility and adoption. We provide support and resources to aid individuals as they Grieve, Restore, Arise, Commemorate and Educate. Further, we commit to make available educational opportunities that will help bring about awareness and prevention of stillbirth.
  • www.myangelchase.com is a site in honor of my son, Chase Thomas, who I lost when I was 18 weeks pregnant. The site includes information about a children’s story I wrote, “Angel Chase and His Mommy’s Sign,” a blog and helpful links/resources.
  • My Forever Child - http://www.myforeverchild.com - Artisan handcrafted and personalized jewelry and keepsakes to comfort those touched by the loss of a child.~
  • Neo Fight - http://www.neofight.org - a nonprofit organization founded in 1976 to help families experiencing a perinatal crisis. Their goal is to ensure that emotional support is available to any family who is going through a difficult pregnancy, has had a miscarriage or stillbirth, has a premature or critically ill newborn, has delivered an infant with special medical needs, or who has experienced the death of a child shortly after birth. Their well-researched web site offers many resources and groups. Calling their 24-hour Listening Line (317) 255-5242 matches parents with a trained parent listener who has had a similar experience. They also hold regular support group meetings in the Indianapolis area, publish a quarterly newsletter, Parents in Touch, and provide hospital in-services. They welcome parents, grandparents, professionals, or anyone wishing to support a parent in their time of crisis.
  • October 15th, Remembering Our Babies - Remembering Our Babies was created to provide support, education and awareness for those who are suffering or may have suffered a miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, a still birth, or the loss of an infant. We hope that we can help you by giving you and all of the other parents, grandparents, siblings, relatives, and friends a special day of remembrance. This special day is October 15th of every year. - http://www.october15th.com
    Also please visit,
    "Remembering Our Babies Memorial Keepsake Boutique" www.rememberingourbabies.net
  • Perinatal Bereavement Services Ontario (PBSO) is a charitable organization that provides support to parents who have suffered the death of their baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, medical interruption, stillbirth or neonatal death. Support groups, facilitated by trained bereaved parents, are held in eleven locations across Ontario. One-to-one matching of newly bereaved parents with trained bereaved parent volunteers is arranged for those in Ontario living outside the areas serviced by a group. Several memorial events are held annually including a Butterfly Release, a Walk to Remember and Candle Lightings. Access to literature on normal grief and grieving and information about other special events is provided through the website at www.pbso.ca. PBSO also provides educational seminars for health care workers who care for these parents at the time of their baby's death.
  • Pregnancy Journeys After Loss -http://www.pregnancyjourneysafterloss.com/- If you or someone you love has experienced a pregnancy loss, this site is for you. Journeys: Stories of Pregnancy After Loss, published by Woven Word Press is a collection of chapter pairs highlighting pregnancy loss and subsequent pregnancy. Each parent describes the loss experience, his or her grief process, and how they coped through the next anxiety-ridden pregnancy. We wrote our stories in the hopes of offering companionship and peace to the next family on this journey.
  • Remembered Forever Online Memorial www.remembered-forever.org - This site was created after a relative living on another continent died and the majority of the family and friends were unable to attend the funeral. It offers online memorialization to cherish and celebrate the lives of loved ones who have died. You can share memories, photos, videos and more, creating an everlasting tribute to those who have passed away, and then it can be accessed from anywhere in the world. There may be a charge.
  • Tributetomyangel - http://hometown.aol.com/dsangelmom/Tributetomyangel.html - Mike and Jean's angel baby was miscarried at 15 weeks in a MA hospital. They were denied the body and have been fighting ever since to make sure other parents are granted their personal and religious rights when it comes to their baby's death. This link includes their story, newspaper articles, their fight at the legislature including a petition MA residents can sign, national and international links to resources and beautiful music and poetry.
New and Favorite Books
  • Angie and Cecil Bellephant offer the first book about losing a son, Titus, to a rare congenital birth defect called Potter’s Syndrome, otherwise known as Bilateral Renal Agenesis (the absence of kidneys). Titus also had Branchio-oto-renal (BOR), a dominant genetic condition that can result in kidney anomalies. Their book is titled: “Giant Hero: One couple’s journey through loving and letting go of a son with Potter’s Syndrome.” (Infinity, September 2008). Angie’s story of choosing to carry her son full term, saying goodbye to him during his 15 hours of life, and turning her mourning into glory will touch those who face a Potter’s diagnosis, infant loss and medical experts who work with expectant parents and newborns. Resources are provided for further information about Potter’s and BOR. This book is funded by the University of Iowa Potter’s Syndrome Research Group. It is available by ordering at major bookstores or online at www.bbotw.com. Also see the Bellephant’s Web site at www.gianthero.net
  • "Labor of Love" for those who have labored, loved and lost" Written by labor and delivery nurse Sandra Schantz, RN, BSN ) to give comfort and guidance to the families experiencing miscarriage, stillbirths and infant death. There are stories shared from families the author worked with during their time of loss. It is also a great companion to the healthcare, funeral and clergy professionals.

For more information about the book and the author: www.helpinghandspublications.com The book is available thru any major bookstore or on line book store by name or author or thru www.laboroflovebook.com

  • Couple Communication After a Baby Dies: Differing Perspective by Sherokee Ilse and Tim Nelson Released October 2008

Bereaved Parents often don't communicate their feelings and needs well, leading to confusion, assumptions, mistrust, and often tension. However, through thoughtful communication, improved understanding, and openness relationships can be significantly improved.

This new small book offers a unique approach to a difficult but important subject. Ilse and nelson teamed up to offer not only their individual perspectivies as a woman and man following the deaths of their children, but also to share how they and their spouses met the challenges couples face. Good background information is offered on topics such as brain differences, personality and childhood influences, myths, and more. Other couples weigh in and thought provoking questions are added to the back for personal use or for book discussion, support groups, or during counseling sessions. To order: www.wintergreenpress.com, www.aplacetoremember.com, or amazon.com.

  • Journeys: Stories of Pregnancy After Loss

    Edited by Amy L. Abbey, and written by a group of parents, Journeys: Stories of Pregnancy After Loss highlights much more than their loss experiences. Each loss story is coupled with a chapter about coping through the next pregnancy. A beautiful book for those contemplating a next pregnancy.
  • Creative Acts of Healing: After a Baby Dies

Judith van Praag, Paseo Press, 1999
Foreword by Michael Berman, M.D.

Creative Acts of Healing: After a Baby Dies is a first person longitudinal account of loss, mourning, grief, healing and recovery. The book offers the reader a source to recognize the slow process of grief and to discover that healing can't be rushed, but may be aided. Creative Acts of Healing provides inspiration to celebrate anniversaries of the baby's birth, Mother's Day and holidays following the loss.

This narrative attests to the power of creativity and nature as a healing force, to consultation of ancient oracles as a mode of meditation to find inner peace and to communication as an important element of the recovery process.

Denise Place for The New Times: "... this memoir [which] chronicles the five years after her tragic loss. As a writer and visual artist, she is inherently inquisitive, which permits her to probe deeply into her experience without being self-absorbed. The result is an insightful and articulate record of her emotional awakening, from which others will greatly benefit."

  • For children: Where Is Chloe? by Donna A. Wilkins, M.D., neonatologist, Credo House Publishers

    This beautiful book touches and teaches children ages 4-8 after their infant sibling has died. Answering questions such as "Am I still a big sister?" "Was it something I said or did?" "Can I travel to heaven?" is only one of many reasons this book will give comfort and understanding to younger children who are wondering what happened. Written from a Christian perspective, this books offers hope in Jesus and the hope of seeing Chloe in heaven one day.
  • From Crisis to Purpose: A Mother's Memoir by Tonya N. Dorsey, Xulon Press

    Tonya shares her sincere, candid, and authentic story about her journey after the loss of her daughter in 2001. "Recounting her soul gripping determination to conquer tormenting grief, Tonya offers validation and inspiration to those who know the agony of unexpected loss. Celebrate the power of resilence as Tonya finds the strengthto perserve in the face of disappointment and despair.
  • A Bereaved Father, Steve Younis (Australia), Create Space, Amazon.com 86 pgs $8.95

    I am a bereaved father. I have lost not one, but two children. My only two children. While I have no children living in my house, I am still a father. Being a bereaved father is not something I ever considered, nor something I wanted to be. However, it is now who I am. In many ways it defines me. Being a bereaved father is complicated. It changes your life... forever. "A Bereaved Father" tells the story of my own experiences as a bereaved father, while giving other parents the opportunity to identify similarities with their own experiences, and find some solace in knowing that they are not going crazy, they are not abnormal, and they are not alone.
  • Losing Emily: A Journey Through Stillbirth to Finding Peace and Embracing New Hope Tammy Anderson, Inkwater Press, Feb 2010, (Canadian author) 82 pages, $16.95

    A powerful and moving must read story based on the author's own heartfelt, painful journey of surviving the stillbirth of her daughter Emily at 37.5 weeks of pregnancy. Losing Emily reaches out to help grieving parents as they embark on their journey of healing by offering words of comfort and peace, a much needed connection to someone who has been there and understands the struggle and true depth of the unimaginable pain of losing a baby. Whether your loss be from a miscarriage, stillbirth or early infant death; there is no greater heartbreak than losing your much loved and wanted child. Through Emily's tragic death, her legacy lives on by sharing a message of new hope to help bereaved parents as they move through the difficult process of healing while finding new strength and courage to carry on without your child.
  • They Were Still Born: Personal Stories About Stillbirth is a collection of personal essays by people who experienced the death of a baby between 20 weeks' gestation and birth. The stories in this book are not easily told, but for the many thousands of families each year who endure the silent tragedy of a stillbirth, they offer a welcome voice of solidarity and guidance. Janel Atlas, familiar with the pain of losing a child, has selected the firsthand accounts of mothers, fathers, and grandparents, all of whom have reached out to offer readers the comfort of knowing they are not alone on this painful path. Through these stories, the writers found validation of their babies' lives and have now shared the same gift with others. Contributors include, Dr. Joanne Cacciatore ,Dr. Ruth Fretts, Sherokee Ilse Monica Murphy LeMoine, and Tim Nelson. The book is set for a fall 2010 release, from Rowman & Littlefield Publishers, and is available for pre-order.
  • For children: My Baby Big Sister: A Book for Children Born Subsequent to a Pregnancy Loss, Cathy Blanford, CreateSpace, Amazon.com, 40 pages, $6.95

    Cathy Blanford, author of Something Happened, has written a new book especially for those children who are born after there has been a pregnancy loss or infant death in the family. (www.centeringcorp.org) . This book is illustrated by children and simply tells the story so that the subsequent child can understand who this baby, older sibling was and be a part of the family's story. Each page has words for parents to help them as they explain this important family event to their subsequent child

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Last modified: April 12, 2012